I Own A Peloton Bike, And I’m Better Than You
When we’re awake at 4 a.m. on Christmas morning, our Lululemon athleisure wear hugging every crevice of our hard, angular bodies, where will you be? In bed wasting oxygen. That’s where.
The Hardware Store Proves We’ll Never Erase The Sexes From Our Language
You see, I needed a self-centering hole locator to finish a rim joist on the deck we were building, and a pipe nipple, ballcock, and pipe dope for some plumbing repairs. I also needed to buttress a groin vault.
This Week In Weird Twitter, Volume 129
It’s fall, which means it’s time to pick apples and steal cars.
Hillary Clinton Is Poised To Finally Give Baby Boomers A Voice In Presidential Elections
She just needs to embrace these simple steps, plus serve cookies and tea.
I’m Definitely A Real Wall Street Guy Who Hates Elizabeth Warren
You can shake my hand and feel my flesh gripping yours and maybe even sense our lifestyles are comparable.
This Week In Weird Twitter, Volume 128
We’re gonna do what they say can’t be done.
Not Even Jonathan Franzen Can Top My Concern Over Climate Change
Where I live, there’s an organization called Feed The Homeless While Not Using Any Fossil Fuels And Fighting Racism. I give them $100 a year so they don’t ring my doorbell.
This Week In Weird Twitter, Volume 127
He swept his right arm across hall, looked me in the eye, and said three little words that every benevolent ruler wants to hear: ‘We’re commanding them.’
The Washington Post Is Worse For The Planet Than Dogs Are
The Washington Post is one of the world’s most destructive newspapers. Their attack on man’s best friend proves it.
What Democrats Really Sound Like In Their ‘How Socialist Can You Get’ Primary Debates
Any similarities to candidate comments made after this article has published is merely evidence of the author’s clairvoyance.
A$AP Rocky Found Guilty Of Assault, Won’t Serve Further Jail Time
American rapper A$AP Rocky and two of his “crew” members were found guilty on charges of assault in Sweden, but they will not serve time.
15 Best Tweets About Chris Cuomo’s Insane Response To Being Called ‘Fredo’
CNN host Chris Cuomo lost his mind when he was compared to ‘The Godfather’s’ Fredo last night. In his hilarious overreaction, Cuomo compared the movie reference to the N-word.
Left-Wing ‘Fact-Checker’ Snopes Is Trying To Deplatform Babylon Bee
The fact-checking website Snopes.com, wrote a “fact-check” article questioning the satirical nature of the Babylon Bee.
President Trump Calls Out Swedish Prime Minister For Jailing A$AP Rocky
President Trump called out the Swedish prime minister on July 25 for what Trump believes to be wrongful treatment of the African American U.S. citizen and rapper A$AP Rocky.
This Week In Weird Twitter, Volume 126
Running as a ‘legitimate’ candidate‒a true man of the people‒is a marathon, not a sprint.
We Work For Bernie, Here Are Our Demands
We, the workers of Sandernista International Local 101, demand fair and equal treatment from our employer, Bernie Sanders.
Rep. Ilhan Omar Caught Embellishing Story She Used To Smear America’s Justice System
In a recent profile by the Washington Post, Rep. Ilhan Omar is caught distorting facts to illustrate ‘American racism, cruelty and injustice.’
This Week In Weird Twitter, Volume 125
Pardon me, gentle voters, but ¿Donde está la biblioteca?
Why ‘Law And Order: Hate Crimes Unit’ Is The Show America Needs
The new Netflix original mini-series exposes the dark heart of American hatred with all the trappings of ‘Law and Order’ we love.
The Donald J. Trump Presidential Twitter Library Is Shallow But Funny
Trevor Noah’s museum pop-up featuring the tweets of the president is certainly humorous, but its one-joke approach wears a little thin.
- Impeachment Is Slowly Destroying Democrats’ 2020 Political HopesThe Democratic effort to impeach Trump and overturn thecontinue reading >
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- How To Prepare For The Impending Justice Department Inspector General ReportWhat can we expect from Inspector General Michael Horowcontinue reading >
