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I’d Like To Tell The Health Experts Where They Can Shove Their Second Mask

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That’s it, the mask Karens are really getting on my nerves. I’m not talking about the woman in the grocery store who lectures you in the bread aisle from 10 feet away that you’re wearing your mask incorrectly — although she’s ticking me off too.

I’m talking about so-called health experts who change their minds on the “science” faster than you can say “hydroxychloroquine,” and the Big Tech oligarchs, corporate media bullies, and power-grabbing government tyrants who fall at their feet. I’m talking about the ones who are now encouraging you to cover your face with a second mask.

Continuing the trend of Babylon Bee headlines being prophetic, Twitter on Monday decided to promote a Quartz article about “Why it’s time to start double masking.” Just like clockwork, the CDC on Wednesday decided to add double masking to its COVID-19 guidance.

This isn’t the first time this idea’s been floated. Pete Buttigieg and his partner notoriously doubled up their masks at the inauguration because they care about people twice as much as the rest of us do, apparently. Corporate media clowns have been chattering about it on their networks. But now Big Tech is promoting it, Anthony Fauci is doing it when cameras are on him, and it’s just the next rung on America’s ladder into bottomless COVID purgatory.

Spoiler alert: The “science” of double-masking was provided by “a lab test with dummies” sprayed with aerosols, not even real living, breathing humans capable of contracting illnesses.

How is it that Wuhan virus cases are plummeting in the United States and vaccines are being distributed by the millions, yet we’re being instructed to multiply the cloth diapers we strap onto our faces, based on nothing more than mannequin tests? If two is better than one, why not three or five? Surely we can do better than 95 percent efficacy.

How did we go from “15 days to slow the spread” to Fauci saying, a year and two vaccine developments later, that we still can’t take our masks off until the virus “is not a threat at all,” which we are “not near”?

An Obvious Path to a Second Mask

A look back over the antics of the past year shed some light on how we got here. While Nancy Pelosi was off to the salon getting a nonessential blowout and Gavin Newsom was yucking it up with other members of the ruling class indoors without a mask, most Americans were canceling their holiday travel plans, staying home from church, and choking on stale mask air between bites at restaurants.

It’s not that skeptical Americans didn’t fight back. They hosted lockdown protests and some refused to relegate church to Zoom. Others wore their masks around their necks or not at all in a show of reasonable defiance. But to what end?

Big Tech issued warnings or nuked content when dissenters cut against conventional wisdom. Airlines kicked parents and even toddlers off planes if they refused to wear a mask with multiple layers. “No shoes, no shirt, no mask, no entry,” became the standard of many private businesses.

After some weak initial resistance, even freedom-loving Americans weary of their leaders shut up and masked up because they were sick of the Karens and the tyrants and the threats of service denial everywhere they turned. The mask overlords got away with their petty authoritarianism, and it emboldened them.

Trust the Science?

Learn from the past; don’t wear a second mask. Not only will it reinforce to our politicos that their every wish is our command, but it is also anti-science.

“Observations during SARS suggested double-masking and other practices increased the risk of infection because of moisture, liquid diffusion and pathogen retention,” a group of scientists concluded after a randomized trial, publishing their findings in BMJ Open in March 2015, long before the our current politicized plight. “These effects may be associated with cloth masks” (the types of masks we’re all wearing now).

In fact, if we care about science, we’ll stop letting the same people who have tanked our economy, kept our kids home from school, and banished us from churches dictate our lives for one more minute. So much of the nonsense that has poured out of their mouths, over the airwaves, and into our homes and institutions these past many months has proved to be utter hogwash — about masks, “flattening the curve,” nursing homes, schools, “essential” versus “nonessential” businesses, the vaccine, and getting “back to normal.” The rules served corporatists’ interests, not public health or the general welfare.

They told us Costco was safer than the ballot box. They said Gov. Andrew Cuomo, who sent COVID-19-positive patients into nursing homes as superspreaders among the most vulnerable, was an exemplary leader. They said mass protests and riots were OK but worship was reckless. They ignored science to please teachers unions, told you to stay in your house for the holidays then jetted off to their vacation homes, and said mask up to save lives — lying even about the efficacy of masks.

A Ruling Class That Doesn’t Deserve Allegiance

“The physical properties of a cloth mask, reuse, the frequency and effectiveness of cleaning, and increased moisture retention, may potentially increase the infection risk for health care workers,” the BMJ Open study continued, revealing that even the types of single masks we’ve all embraced may not do anything to protect us, while potentially harming us. Studies have found people who “always” wear masks still get COVID-19 at alarming rates.

Sure, N95s — the masks they told you not to buy because they should be reserved for medical professionals — are effective at slowing the spread. Democratic governors’ mandates, however, don’t require these effective masks, just a “face covering,” meaning these mandates aren’t truly about keeping people safe. They’re about forcing American citizens to declare their allegiance to the ruling class’s coercive coronavirus regime, made up of C-suite executives, corporate media, Big Tech, and power-hungry politicians who benefit politically, personally, and professionally from keeping nervous people under their thumbs.

That regime, however, doesn’t deserve your allegiance. It derives its power not from truth and science but from the capitulation of the panicky masses. Don’t cave to the bullies who will undoubtedly scream that you’re a science-denier if you refuse a second mask. Tomorrow, they’ll be shouting that you’re a murderer because you won’t slap a third swatch of fabric over your mouth. The more the better, right? There’s no limiting principle; we know how this goes.

COVID is real. But so are the coronavirus hypocrites, and they feed on your fear. They’ve denied the science for the past year to control you, and until Americans stop playing their games, there will be no end to the madness. We’ll all be indefinitely sitting around alone and masked, talking to our friends on Zoom, and waiting for our Amazon deliveries. If they tell you to wear a second mask, it might be time to tell them where to shove it.