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Predictions Can’t Be Crazy Enough For What Democrat Presidential Candidates Will Say At The LGBT Town Hall

LGBT Joe Biden

It has been well-documented that today’s popular moralistic crusades have a strong religious character, especially for candidates in the Democratic presidential primary. On topics such as abortion, climate change, and LGBT issues, the far-left bent of the Democratic Party requires candidates to do a thorough examination of conscience, generally followed by a public display of repentance. Take, for example, Joe Biden’s apology tour, an apparent requirement before he even announced his candidacy.

We’ve already had the television town halls on climate change, and Planned Parenthood has a solid lockdown on abortion orthodoxy, so the next primary gauntlet is the CNN LGBTQ Democratic presidential debate, hosted by the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) on Oct. 10. Groups like HRC have moved the goalposts extremely far left in a very short amount of time on this issue. Not only will candidates have pasts to atone for, but they’ll be expected to show that they ascribe to current LGBT orthodoxy, no matter how radical.

Given the nature of the topic, this particular display of moral fervor will likely look more like a bad Monty Python skit than a genuine religious experience. So here’s a little preview of what we might expect as the candidates vie for the title of “Wokest of Them All.” Just remember, no matter how crazy it all seems, the next time a Democrat is inaugurated president, we’ll all be living under the LGBT canon law.

Joe Biden

Already on the defensive after calling Vice President Mike Pence a “decent guy,” because apparently such a benign comment is beyond the pale for today’s political discourse on the left, Biden will surely need some extreme remarks in order to repent for his past sins. If the recent Iowa LGBTQ Forum sideshow was any indication, LGBT activists may forgive, but they never forget. Biden found himself in the hot seat over several past acts, including when the host questioned whether him referring to Pence as “decent” is an indication that he might compromise with Republicans on LGBT issues.

Apparently, presiding over a same-sex wedding wasn’t enough to show his devotion. That was 2016. It’s 2019, and if Biden wants to get with the times, he should be volunteering to referee a track and field meet that pits biological boys against girls. He needs that photo op, applauding as boys easily cinch the top spots while college scouts look on. And definitely no religious freedom for Christians.

Pete Buttigieg

The first openly gay presidential candidate represents a particularly interesting paradox in this showdown. You would think that as groups such as HRC keep a tally of the number of LGBT political leaders elected, they would be all in on the first gay president.

Yet as Democratic candidates line up to portray themselves as the furthest left on LGBT issues, a 2019 poll found that 87 percent of LGBT people think Mayor Pete’s sexual orientation will actually be a stumbling block in the general election, even in turning out the Democratic vote. It seems he’s cracked open that uniquely leftist Pandora’s box of intersectionality — the only gay candidate doesn’t even have the full support of LGBT people due to his “white male-ness.” This is not a joke.

Take it from this Huffington Post writer, who says Buttigieg is “exposing tensions in the LGBTQ community between gay white men, who benefit from the economic and social privileges of being white men, and all the other queer people who don’t.” Or as this Slate writer puts it: “Has Buttigieg faced setbacks or barriers to success because he’s gay? … Would a win for Buttigieg be as historically significant and culturally meaningful as a win for a member of an underrepresented race or gender?” It’s a provocative question to entertain in the midst of a debate designed to portray LGBT people as an aggrieved and suffering minority.

An interesting challenge awaits Mayor Pete. As all of the other candidates talk about their gay friends or non-binary family members (as did Cory Booker), is Buttigieg supposed to talk about his black friends or his low-income second cousin? No matter how he plays it, poor Mayor Pete just won’t be able to escape those pesky facts of his sex and race, assigned to him at birth by some know-it-all doctor.

Amy Klobuchar

This senator from Minnesota should have some surprises in store no matter what she says in the debate, given that she has yet to say much at all on the subject. A slow evolutionist on marriage, she finally voiced her support for same-sex marriage following President Obama’s switcheroo in 2012. Of course, actions speak louder than words, and Klobuchar has officially decided to throw her fellow females under the bus as a co-sponsor of the Equality Act.

Beto O’Rourke

Beto seems to be ahead of the game, having released a comprehensive plan back in June explaining all of the ways he would gut the legal rights of women, children, and religious people. Forcing schools to let boys in girls’ locker rooms and to allow boys on girls sports teams, shutting down Christian adoption agencies and displacing their foster children, and forcing Catholic hospitals to do sex-change surgeries are all high priorities for O’Rourke. All of these actions would be accomplished under the Equality Act, which all of the Democrat presidential candidates have vowed to sign, but they can also be done through executive action.

Beto has vowed to make them a priority, but if the last years of the Obama administration were any indication, these items will be a priority no matter which Democrat is elected. If O’Rourke wants to stand out, he’s going to have to get even more creative.

Cory Booker

Like Cory Booker! The New Jersey senator is gunning hard for the title of wokest, and the competition had better watch out. While many have lamented that LGBT activists make up words and expect the rest of us to use them, Booker is one-upping them by making up words that even LGBT activists don’t know.

In a recent interview with a transgender activist, Booker took the chance to educate everyone, including his host, on the terminology for his young, non-binary relative Avery: “niephew.” That’s “a combination of niece and nephew,” he explained to all of us folks still living in the dark ages.

But take heart — even someone as woke as Booker makes mistakes from time to time, like when he referred to his “niephew” as “she” in the same breath as “they.” Anyway, he’ll surely get credit for trying. Pronouns are hard these days.

Kamala Harris Versus Elizabeth Warren

Kamala Harris and Elizabeth Warren curiously share the same stain on their otherwise glossy LGBT rights records, and it’s a doozy. Are you ready for this one? Opposition to state-funded sex-reassignment surgery for incarcerated transgender women (men who identify as women).

That’s right. More than 12 million children live in families that can’t afford enough food, but these two Democrats are now arguing that taxpayers should pay for convicted murderers to get fake boobs.

Julián Castro

As the secretary of Housing and Urban Development under President Obama, Castro spent much of his time at HUD removing safe spaces for abused, homeless women. By opening homeless shelters on the basis of people’s stated gender identity rather than sex, he made sure traumatized women fleeing sex trafficking or abusive relationships should have to sleep near and shower with biological men if those men simply say they’re women.

However, Castro already had one misgendering mishap on the big debate stage, when he touted his support for taxpayer-funded abortions for “trans females.” (Lest you are not woke enough to understand, trans females are men who identify as women). It’s an easy mistake to understand, though, because according to the transgender activists in charge of writing the woke bible, men who identify as women actually are women, and women who identify as men are men. What Castro really meant to say was that he supports taxpayer-funded abortions for pregnant men — because science.

In other news, his fellow candidate Buttigieg has yet to comment on whether it would be equally disturbing to find the remains of 2,000 aborted babies in his neighborhood abortionist’s garage if they came from transgender men, or if he would find that socially acceptable.

Sadly, Kirsten “Gay Rights!” Gillibrand didn’t make it this far.