“The Office” quickly became one of the most quotable TV shows with cringe-worthy moments and lines so stupid it makes you laugh out loud. It turns out the 2020 Democratic presidential field isn’t all that different. Here’s who each of the 2020 Dems would be if they took a role in NBC’s “The Office.”
Joe Biden: Michael Scott
Plagiarism and flipping your position multiple times — sound familiar? They’re both bad, and both Joe Biden and Michael Scott don’t seem to understand that. Let’s explain it to them like they’re five.
Biden is notorious for using work that is not his own. Michael Scott wrote Pam a goodbye poem when she left for art school in New York, and he “took a lot from other poems.” When he wrote Helene’s birthday poem, he stole it wholesale from Shel Silverstein.
Changing stances on the Hyde Amendment that prevents federal funds from paying for abortions is Biden’s specialty. Flip-flopping is Michael Scott’s specialty, as well. How about Scott’s Tots?
Cory Booker: Dwight Schrute
Cory Booker and Dwight Schrute both don’t want to be idiots, but with titles like “Spartacus” and “Assistant to the Regional Manager,” it’s tough not to. Cory Booker wants to pass health care for all, which is wildly unrealistic. When Phyllis gets flashed by a pedophile, Dwight wants to rid the office of bananas and women wearing makeup in order to solve the problem. Also unrealistic. They both have good intentions, but terrible solutions.
Pete Buttigieg: Toby Flenderson
They both try to be heard and no one seems to be listening to their obvious, yet gentle, messaging. Pete Buttigieg truly is the Toby of the 2020 Democratic race. Buttigieg tries to be heard and tell anyone who will listen about his platform and his ideas, just like Toby tries to tell everyone about his time on the Scranton Strangler jury.
As a mayor of South Bend, Indiana, Buttigieg may as well be back in the annex with Toby. Residents of South Bend say Buttigieg hasn’t done much to help the city, and Michael Scott would say the same thing about Toby in the office.
Kirsten Gillibrand: Holly Flax
A little awkward and a lot of cringeworthy? Sounds like Kirsten Gillibrand and Holly Flax all summed up. Gillibrand showed up to the Iowa LGBT pride parade, and a video posted of her was about as weird as flipping someone off with your ring finger.
Kirsten Gillibrand relaxes after working a gay bar in Iowa pic.twitter.com/JYiU3c0Oc9
— Behind 2020 (@behind2020) June 8, 2019
Kamala Harris: Jan Levinson
Kamala Harris has an issue with everything and everyone, so does Jan Levinson. Jan claims to have a “self-destructive streak,” and if you follow Harris’s campaign for more than five minutes, you’ll come to similar conclusions. Not to mention that it’s difficult to find a picture of Jan in a colorful outfit, and same with Kamala. Grey and black blazer suits are a go-to for these self-destructive #girlbosses.
Beto O’Rourke: Andy Bernard
A candidate who looks perfect on paper, but then you meet him in real life and he’s, well, awkward. These two are constantly trying to impress those around them in their rise to mediocrity.
Beto was given the opportunity to run for what seemed like a vulnerable seat in the Senate, and he failed. Andy was given the opportunity to become regional manager of Dunder Mifflin-Scranton, and he failed as well. Maybe they should both pursue their careers in acting.
Bernie Sanders: Creed Bratton
Creed is the office nut job. He talks about subjects that make no sense and he’s losing his mind. But he doesn’t care, and neither does Bernie. Democratic leadership has condemned Bernie for his outwardly socialist policies and for promoting unrealistic ideas, but you know who doesn’t care? Bernie. Because he’s Democrats’ nut job.
Elizabeth Warren: Angela Martin
Elizabeth Warren and Angela Martin are substance-oriented women, but they don’t have a lot of flash going for them. When Warren first announced that she was running for president, she posted a video of her drinking a beer. It makes you feel bad for her beer.
When Angela wanted to win the Scranton-Wilkes-Barre coupon book, she wore a slutty nurse’s costume. She walked down the runway in a manner that made the whole office stop and cringe.
Andrew Yang: Kelly Kapoor
He’s like really smart for coming up with ideas that won’t work in this country. You could ask Andrew Yang what he wants to do about health care in the United States, and he would be like “Blah blah blah blah blah blah,” giving you the exact answer that only the socialists in this country want to hear.
Although Yang has a ton of ideas for if he were to become president, he consistently has to prove it to Americans, because when you look at his campaign website, you might think he’s a little crazy.