America’s political reporters got off to a quick start Wednesday morning. Hard to blame them cracking a beer. They were probably still buzzing from The New York Times’ Tuesday story declaring the video evidence of actual Portland rioters burning Bibles as… Russian propaganda!
NYT debunks Portland Bible-burning story. It wasn't a 'stack' of Bibles. It was just one. Or maybe two. And it was only 'kindling to start a bigger fire.' Yes, an American flag was also burned. And yes, the crowd cheered. But it's Russian disinformation… https://t.co/K0c6onx1za pic.twitter.com/XVBGfFXVXz
— Byron York (@ByronYork) August 12, 2020
Woah, what a high!
But guys, there’s more. Tuesday night, Ol’ Sleepy Creepy picked Sen. Kamala Harris to be the Dem presidential nominee. Imagine the excitement? “That’s my BFF headed to the White House!” The very politician who CNN’s Maeve Reston, NBC’s Ali Vitali and CBS’s Caitlin Huey-Burns took on a shopping spree!
— Ali Vitali (@alivitali) February 16, 2019
— Caitlin Huey-Burns (@CHueyBurns) February 16, 2019
Please understand. We all have texting buddies, and most reporters have assignment editors, but imagine if those two combined into one super cool friend who might be headed to the White House? Well that’s what just happened CNN’s Kyung Lah. Imagine the scoops she’ll get?
So we can forgive the rest of the press being happy for their friends. And happy they were.
Politico’s Anna Palmer and Jake Sherman were just Corn Pops for Kamala, getting right to it in the opening graph of their morning newsletter:
According to Politico, Kamala "deftly hops between the Democratic Party’s shifting tectonic plates."
Another way to say that might be she's an unprincipled careerist who morphs her beliefs to the moment & viciously rounds on those who don't keep up… But I mean, whatever…
— Christopher Bedford (@CBedfordDC) August 12, 2020
Woah there, remember what your dad told you and don’t be an asshole, Bedford, there’s probably more substance right… below…
Here it is: Kamala is “a Chuck Taylor-wearing 55… the picture of vigor… at one with contemporary pop culture and steeped in the issues facing Americans.”
And we learn all that in just one sentence?
Well, who’s she running against anyway? Oh, just two old white men who kill Americans is all, so back to Harris, who “is unafraid to mix it up with reporters, eager — OK, maybe just willing — to stop in the Capitol to chat with the vulturous press corps.”
Magic Eye this ain’t: You don’t even need to look real close and then back up slowly to see the excitement, kids, they literally check themselves in real time.
I feel like I’m reading the origin story for a Kamala Harris Marvel movie … deftly hopping on tectonic plates … https://t.co/w1eHwLL15z
— Geoffrey Ingersoll (@GPIngersoll) August 12, 2020
But let’s put some context on this hot dog: We’re talking about a reporter who started a podcast and lecture series called “Women Rule” to save the dreams and self-worth of all the little girls she knew were crushed when Hillary Clinton lost to Donald Trump. At least the little girls who survived Roe. So she’s excited, and we shouldn’t be harsh.
Know who’s not excited? Shaun King. Remember him? He’s the white guy who says he’s a black guy who used to write for The Daily News and now does something else I think. Well he’s not taking this one sitting down. Not one bit.
I'll be frank and tell you two Democrats that I am 99% sure I won't be supporting – primarily because of their dismal history on criminal justice reform over the course of their entire careers.
Joe Biden & Kamala Harris.
They both helped build & advance mass incarceration.
— Shaun King (@shaunking) November 14, 2018
Guy must be piiiissssssed. I mean, what’s he going to do, vote Trump? There’s only so many total identity-shifts a man can take before his body begins to break down. So let’s… take… a look:
Shaun King never fails to impress. pic.twitter.com/ZS4GCg6MIb
— Matthew Harkrider (@MHark) August 12, 2020
Oh. Well… his body his choice.
Speaking of choices, The New York Times’ front-page editor had a big one: where to put Kamala? When unsure, and in the interest of fairness, it’s always best to let history be the guide. Treat others as you, ya know, treat others sort of thing, right?
— Michael Brendan Dougherty (@michaelbd) August 12, 2020
Wrong. It is, after all, the current year.
But surely not everything is honky dory in KamalaPlayLand? I mean, there is that time she was talking to her new host body on a nationally televised stage and chose to begin a sentence with “I don’t think you’re a racist… but…” and end it with a story about how his racist policy crushed her childhood dreams.
I mean, that’s gotta sting, right?
Relax. Turns out? Didn’t happen!
In the first sentence of the first statement it released about the Harris pick, the Trump campaign made two obviously false assertions about her. https://t.co/tgl9LvCFqL
— Philip Bump (@pbump) August 12, 2020
He’s right, of course. She let everyone in America know she thought he was pretty racist, as The New Yorker noted, but she didn’t actually say the magic words. Philip is a serious reporter, after all, not one to hear dog whistles in every political utterance. But before we award points for consistency, let’s just do a quick… little…
You know where else talk of Henry Ford might overlap with discussions of bloodlines? https://t.co/SJxJUdkeKt
— Philip Bump (@pbump) May 21, 2020
The other thing is that if you want to whistle for your dog, you don’t need to if it’s already standing next to you.
— Philip Bump (@pbump) July 2, 2016
Oh. Good to know.