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Country Singer Jake Owen Roasts Bachelorette ‘Alabama Hannah’

“But you got to lay in the bed you made, and I hate to let you down. Girl, this ain’t no windmill, we can’t go round and round,” sang Jake Owen.


Like most men who watch “The Bachelor,” country music artist Jake Owen claimed his girlfriend had the reality show turned on Monday night when he happened to see former bachelorette Hannah Brown weasel her way into yet another season. A few days later, Owen went “live from the barn” on Twitter to perform a savage diss track he wrote about “Alabama Hannah.”

Owen assured his fans he loves Hannah, “so it’s not a diss on her,” but the lyrics land this song solidly in the diss track genre.

“Alabama Hannah, what do you want? If it’s love that you need, well then, honey, it’s gone. You had your chances, so won’t you leave me alone. Alabama Hannah, won’t you go on back home. I been out here in California, I’ve been soaking up the sun. There’s lots of pretty ladies, and I can’t pick just one. I’m flying high, I got peace of mind, I already raised the bar. Now you’re showing up here tonight, who do you think you are?”

No song about Hannah would be complete without a windmill reference. He continued:

“You’re a beauty queen and a dancing star, and I think you’ll do just fine. Well, I guess you think you messed up since you seen me moving on. Thinking we could pick up, right where we left off. But you got to lay in the bed you made, and I hate to let you down. Girl, this ain’t no windmill, we can’t go round and round.”

It did not take long for Hannah B. to respond. “It’s hilarious,” said the girl who totally doesn’t think it’s hilarious but is trying to play it cool. “To be honest, this is, uh, this is funny,” she said, sounding like she was trying to reassure herself as much as her Roll Tide #TeamHannahB fans.

She didn’t go after Owen seriously, but she did zing the Facebook boomers. “It’s not near as brutal as what these 40-year-old Facebook moms say about me.”

In reality, Hannah B., “The Bachelor” host Chris Harrison, and all the producers at ABC are probably more than happy to be highlighted by Owen. It wouldn’t even be surprising if someone at ABC had put him up to it. He does admit in the video that he recently performed on the show during Hannah’s season, so someone has his number.

Social media has caused a tectonic shift in what it means to be a “Bachelor” or “Bachelorette” contestant these days. As former contestant Jillian Anderson recently told The Federalist, “Social media has really helped launch these contestants into instant fame. The rules of social media were tighter when I was on the show, and the producers have really loosened their grip to the point where posting is encouraged.”

Contestants are all but guaranteed massive social media followings and the sweet, sweet Flat Tummy Tea sponsorships that come with them. Conversely, ABC producers now recruit their next batch of contestants from prominent Instagram influencers, instead of the old fashioned way of audition tapes.

The reality is that reality TV is now so much more than just what we see on primetime. It’s now all the time, and anyone, even random country music stars, can join in. So in case you haven’t had enough of Hannah Brown already, or are worried Bachelor Pete is about to finally dump her, I suspect she will be hanging around on Instagram for a long time.