When The Doomsday Preppers Steal All The Chicken, Try Making Spam Fried Rice

When The Doomsday Preppers Steal All The Chicken, Try Making Spam Fried Rice

While we’re all shut up in our homes with crazy kids, screaming into a pillow just waiting for the world to move along, we have to cook with what we can scrounge up at the half-barren grocery store. You know what that means? Spam!

Yep, that World War II-staple meat in a can that the Hawaiians seem abnormally to adore is actually pretty good. I’ll admit, before I cooked with it the other day, I had never eaten Spam. I mean, it’s meat in a can, so that’s weird. Not to mention, they don’t do a great job of marketing. In the end, though, Spam is actually tasty, and right now, just like in the hard times of World War II, it’s a reliable protein.

How do you cook with Spam? The answer is several ways, but this Spam fried rice I made the other night — which my kids loved — is a great place to start.

Here’s everything I used to make the dish:

  • one can of regular Spam
  • a couple eggs
  • chopped garlic
  • chopped onions
  • chopped carrots
  • halved grape tomatoes
  • chopped chives
  • fish sauce
  • soy sauce
  • sesame oil
  • ginger
  • frozen peas
  • rice

Spam fried rice

Step One: Cook the rice per the instructions on the box, then spread it out on a sheet pan to cool and air dry. This will make it a little drier and better for the stir fry.

Step Two: Remove the Spam from the can and slice it into equal-size pieces.

Step Three: Fry the Spam in a skillet with a bit of fat in the pan (butter, oil, etc.) Flip until both sides are golden brown, then remove to a paper-lined plate to drain.

Spam fried rice

Step Four: Add the onions and carrots to that same skillet and cook on medium-high heat until tender. Add a few dashes of soy sauce, fish sauce, and sesame oil to taste. I used quite a bit, but that’s up to you.

Step Five: When the onions and carrots are done, add the frozen peas and garlic.

Step Six: Making room in the pan for a blank spot, add the cracked and beaten eggs, cooking them until they’re done to your preference. Then mix them into the rest of the skillet.

Step Seven: Cut each piece of Spam into quarters. Add the Spam, halved tomatoes, and dried rice to the pan. Add additional soy sauce to taste, and a spoonful of shredded ginger (you can get it in a jar at the store). Stir, taste, and add as much pepper as you’d like.

Spam fried rice

Step Eight: Spoon into a bowl and top it with chopped chives and as much sriracha as you can stand. Ta-da, it’s Spam fried rice!

Spam fried rice

So if you can’t find a fancy rib roast or even some chicken breasts readily available at your local plague-ravaged market, grab a can of Spam and make some damn tasty Spam fried rice.

Brad Jackson is a writer and radio personality whose work has appeared at ABC, CBS, Fox News, and multiple radio programs. He was the longtime host and producer of Coffee & Markets, an award-winning podcast and radio show with more than 1,500 episodes. Brad covers all things edible and cultural for The Federalist. You can find him on Twitter and Instagram at @bradwjackson.
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