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I Called Donald Trump. Here’s What Happened Next

Call me, maybe?

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Several weeks after Donald Trump gave out Sen. Lindsey Graham’s cell phone number, Gawker apparently published Trump’s cell phone number. I decided to give him a call. Here’s what happened next.

A long pause.

During this pause, I remember IJReview’s video with Graham where he destroys his phone in an astoundingly creative fashion. I wonder if Trump will destroy his, or merely hand it off to a staffer to deal with. I like to imagine him running it over with a wheelbarrow of money.

To my disappointment, I get a voicemail message.

But get this: it’s not even his voice. It’s a female robot spitting words out at me. Oh, and I can’t leave a message, because his voicemail inbox is full. It’s likely that his phone blew up within the hour and a half between Gawker publishing his number and the time I gave him a call, or maybe his voicemail inbox is always full. Trump reminds me of my dad, who never checks his voicemail, so it’s quite possible the billionaire-reality-TV-star-turned-presidential-candidate also neglects his.

I decide to text him. I explain who I am, that I would like to talk to him about the upcoming debate and the media coverage surrounding his campaign, including Gawker’s decision to publish his cell number. Maybe he will text me back, but if he never does I won’t blame him.

This has me thinking of all the things I would have loved to talk to talk to Trump about. Here are five questions I would like to ask Donald Trump if he ever calls me back:

1. Do you think Gawker’s decision to publish your phone number was fair game after you gave out Graham’s?

2. Will you sue anyone over this?

3. Will you destroy your phone in a dramatic fashion?

4. Do you think the media’s coverage of your campaign, including last night’s “Meet The Press” interview, has been fair thus far, or are they not taking your bid for the presidency seriously enough?

5. Do you think the GOP is making a mistake by distancing themselves from you? If so, how would you be an asset to them?

Mr. Trump, if you’re reading this, reach me: bre@thefederalist.com. We can talk about cell phones and other issues.

What are some other questions you’d like to ask Donald Trump? Leave them in a comment below.