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8 Times Hillary Clinton Was Lucille Bluth

Laying down a marker: Hillary Clinton’s 2016 presidential campaign is going to be great and people who are Lucille Bluth will love it.


Hillary Clinton is running for president, and if she wants to win, she’s going to have to connect with Americans who aren’t filthy rich one-percenters like she and her husband, former president Bill Clinton. Can she pull it off? Perhaps. But if she is going to have a chance in 2016, Hillary is going to need to ditch the Lucille Bluth routine. That means no more taxpayer-funded private jets, chauffeured limousines, or $300,000 speech fees. Hillary is going to have to show that she can live like a normal person.

A good way for Hillary to think about this process going forward is to ask herself, “Is this something Lucille Bluth would do?” Here are 8 times Hillary answered that question wrong and ended up looking just like Lucille Bluth.

Hillary Clinton’s views about gay rights haven’t always been very progressive

Just last year, Hillary came under fire from NPR’s Terry Gross, who accused the former Secretary of State of flip-flopping on gay marriage for purely political reasons:

Hillary Clinton had a tense exchange with an NPR host in an interview airing Thursday over whether she made “a calculus” against publicly supporting gay marriage before endorsing it last year.

It’s the first time Clinton, a potential candidate for president in 2016, has been extensively questioned about her support for gay marriage. She did not back it in her 2008 presidential campaign but she issued support for it by video in 2013, weeks after leaving the State Department.

Gross noted that in the 1990s — when Clinton’s husband signed the Defense of Marriage Act, which let states refuse to recognize same-sex marriages permitted by other states and also prevented federal recognition of such unions — there already were supporters of gay marriage.

Hillary Clinton does not take kindly to your demands that she turn over her secret e-mail server

After Hillary’s secret e-mail server scheme became public knowledge, many demanded that she turn over the server so that all e-mails she sent as Secretary of State might be examined by an independent third-party. Clinton, who swore that she totally turned over all of the relevant e-mails after keeping them secret for years, did not take kindly to those demands:

Hillary Clinton revealed Tuesday that she deleted more than 30,000 “personal” emails from her tenure as secretary of state — and won’t allow access to the private computer server she used to send them.

“The server will remain private,” she declared — claiming the off-limits emails were about “yoga routines, family vacations” and other matters that had nothing to do with government.

No one would ever accuse Hillary Clinton or Lucille Bluth of being a teetotaling Prohibitionist

Just like Hillary Clinton, Lucille Bluth knows how to connect with blue collar workers

This is pretty much how Hillary responded to any woman who accused Bill of sexual assault

As the Washington Free Beacon has documented, Hillary has a long history of sliming sexual assault survivors:

As Clinton has appeared at multiple events for women over the past several weeks, her record as an advocate for women has come under increased scrutiny.

Women who have accused her husband, former President Bill Clinton, of sexual misconduct have received special criticism from the former first lady.

One victim of Clinton’s wrath was Monica Lewinsky, whom Clinton called a “narcissistic loony toon” in private conversations with close friend Diane Blair.

Lewinsky was not the only woman who had a sexual relationship with Bill targeted by Hillary: she called Gennifer Flowers “trailer trash.”

Like Lucille Bluth, Hillary Clinton identifies with the financial struggles of the middle class

In an interview with Diane Sawyer in 2014, Hillary Clinton–who charges $300,000 for a single speech and who, along with her husband, has made over $100 million over the last decade or so–claimed that she knows what it’s like to struggle financially. Why? Because, according to Hillary, she and Bill were “dead broke” when they left the White House:

HILLARY CLINTON: Well, if you — you have no reason to remember, but we came out of the White House not only dead broke, but in debt. We had no money when we got there and we struggled to, you know, piece together the resources for mortgages for houses, for Chelsea’s education, you know, it was not easy. Bill has worked really hard and it’s been amazing to me. He’s worked very hard, first of all, we had to pay off all our debts which was, you know, we had to make double the money because of obviously taxes, and pay you have at debts, and get us houses and take care of family members.

Hillary enjoys the same kind of food that we common people enjoy

Clinton’s allies in the media have made a big deal about how much she totally enjoyed the Chipotle burrito she ordered one time. Did you know she ordered a burrito once? All by herself? Well, she did. She ordered a burrito at Chipotle one time, which makes her just like us:

Hillary Rodham Clinton’s presidential campaign is all about “everyday Americans,” she made clear in announcing it on Sunday.

On Monday, she showed how unassuming she herself could be.

Driving to Iowa for her first campaign swing, Mrs. Clinton’s van — with two aides and Secret Service agents aboard — pulled into a Chipotle restaurant for lunch in Maumee, Ohio, a suburb of Toledo.

Hillary is totally going to “topple” the 1%

Yes, Hillary’s campaign allies are actually peddling the line that Hillary–who was apparently so addicted to cash that her family’s non-profit solicited it from foreign governments doing business with the U.S. while Hillary served as Secretary of State–is going to topple the richest 1% of people in the U.S.:

In a meeting with economists this year, Mrs. Clinton intensely studied a chart that showed income inequality in the United States. The graph charted how real wages, adjusted for inflation, had increased exponentially for the wealthiest Americans, making the bar so steep it hardly fit on the chart.

Mrs. Clinton pointed at the top category and said the economy required a “toppling” of the wealthiest 1 percent, according to several people who were briefed on her policy discussions but could not discuss private conversations for attribution.