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Now That Hoodies Are The Senate Uniform, Republicans Should Show Up Sporting These Slogans

Woman wearing hoodie that says "Hunter Biden takes bribes"
Image CreditFDRLST / Canva

Since hoodies are now encouraged in the Senate, Republicans should show up wearing sweats emblazoned with one (or several!) of these reminders.

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Now that Chuck Schumer has dumbed down the Senate dress code to accommodate the slovenly habits of the privileged Pennsylvania senator who cosplays as a representative of the working class, hoodies like Sen. John Fetterman’s signature Carhartt are welcome on the Senate floor.

It’s an ugly visual of the decay of an American institution. But you know what, fine — if that’s the way it’s going to be, Republicans might as well play along. If they want something comfier but just as effective as Susan Collins’s suggested ensemble, they should show up wearing hoodies emblazoned with one (or several!) of these reminders.

1. ‘Impeach Biden’

As my colleague David Harsanyi has pointed out, there exists “more than enough evidence” of Biden corruption for an impeachment probe.

Joe Biden has publicly bragged about bullying Ukraine into firing a prosecutor who was investigating Burisma, an energy firm that paid his son Hunter Biden millions to sit on its board and reportedly hired him to access the protection his father’s political power could provide. We also know that Joe Biden spoke with Hunter’s associates dozens, if not hundreds, of times and that the Bidens received millions from foreign oligarchs.

2. ‘Boys And Girls Are Different’

It’s an indisputable fact that there are two sexes and we are not the same, but stating that obvious truth often causes the brains of Democrats who push transgender mania to combust.

3. ‘Democrats Support Abortion Up to Birth’

They don’t like to admit it, but Democrats in Congress overwhelmingly voted for a bill that would ensure abortions throughout all nine months of a woman’s pregnancy as long as she could find a provider to say it was important for her emotional health. Democrat-led states like Colorado have explicitly enacted laws permitting abortion up to birth, and Democrats in Washington have opposed protections for babies born alive in botched abortions.

4. ‘Hunter Biden Takes Bribes’

It’s no secret that Hunter Biden peddled access to his powerful father among his well-heeled foreign clients. In return, Hunter was rewarded with everything from shrouded bank transfers to a car with a six-figure price tag to a three-carat diamond.

Sen. Bob Menendez, who was recently indicted by Hunter’s dad’s DOJ for his own shady dealings, might consider a riff on this slogan, such as “Hunter Biden’s Bribery Scandal Is Worse Than Mine!”

5. ‘Biden Jails His Political Opponents’

Biden’s Department of Justice is prosecuting his 2020 presidential rival and likely 2024 opponent in multiple jurisdictions, threatening him with years of jail time. Not only has the DOJ gone after Trump, it’s targeted peaceful pro-lifers and parents at school board meetings, while throwing the book at Trump supporters like a nonviolent grandma with cancer for being at the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021.

6. ‘Trump Won’

Yes, we’re aware that Biden won the 2020 election in a very literal sense, had more votes recorded for him, and was inaugurated as our 46th president. On the other hand, it clearly wasn’t our “most secure election ever” — it was rigged, or “fortified,” in numerous ways that were damaging to the integrity of our elections.

But you don’t have to get into the nuances of that to exercise your First Amendment rights by wearing a hoodie and enjoy the reactions it inspires.

7. ‘Defund The FBI’

Until the FBI stops interfering in our elections — as they did by falsely labeling the bombshell Biden corruption story sourced from Hunter Biden’s laptop as “disinformation” in 2020 and by furthering the Trump-Russia collusion hoax in 2016 — congressional Republicans should refuse to keep paying its bills.

8. ‘Unborn Lives Matter’

This shouldn’t be controversial, right?

9. ‘Keep Porn Out of Schools’

This one shouldn’t be controversial either. But left-leaning school boards are working hard to fill school libraries with pornographic books promoting their LGBT agenda. They want you to think this is an issue of backwater Republicans “banning” harmless books like To Kill A Mockingbird, but when parents try to read the contents of the books in question at public meetings, it’s deemed too explicit for the ears of the adults in the room.

10. ‘Who Killed JFK?’

Why are parts of more than 15,000 records relating to the Kennedy assassination still being kept from the public after Biden delayed their release? What convinced Kennedy’s nephew that the CIA was involved in what he calls a “60-year coverup”?

11. ‘Save Girls’ Sports’

Allowing boys and men with gender dysphoria to enter girls’ locker rooms, bathrooms, and sports teams is neither safe nor fair to women, but Democrats want to do it anyway.

12. Trump’s Mugshot

OK, it’s not a slogan, but we’d still love to see Senate Republicans show up wearing this.


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