If the E. coli outbreak created a romaine-lettuce-sized hole in your holiday diet, here’s a carefully curated list of things you can eat instead. All of the options below are better than choking down flavorless green leaves.
- Paper
- Almost anything from Arby’s
- Microwave nachos
- Nothing at all
- The New York Times’s guacamole recipe
- Beer
- Chelsea Clinton’s pancakes
- Milksteak
- A hot dog from Burger King
- Chrissy Teigen’s cookbook (not the recipes, the actual book)
- Vinny Guadagnino’s keto pizza
- Scotch tape
- Rachel Green’s English trifle
- “Chicken of the Cave”
- Whatever device you’re reading this on
In conclusion, Thanksgiving is not the time for salad.
Emily Jashinsky is culture editor at The Federalist and host of Federalist Radio Hour. She previously covered politics as a commentary writer for the Washington Examiner. Prior to joining the Examiner, Emily was the spokeswoman for Young America’s Foundation. She’s interviewed leading politicians and entertainers and appeared regularly as a guest on major television news programs, including “Fox News Sunday,” “Media Buzz,” and “Washington Journal." Her work has been featured in the Wall Street Journal, the Telegraph, The Hill, and more. Emily also serves as director of the National Journalism Center, co-host of the news show “Counter Points” on the Breaking Points network and a visiting fellow at Independent Women's Forum. Originally from Wisconsin, she is a graduate of George Washington University.
