Skip to content
Breaking News Alert HHS Secretary Admits The Feds Will Punish Hospitals That Resist Trans Mutilation

Dan Crenshaw Is The Sexy Congressman America Needs

Dan Crenshaw is an American hero, a patriot, and a man compelled to serve his nation beyond the sacrifice he’s already given in military service. He’s also quite handsome.


Dan Crenshaw is not just a congressional candidate for Texas. He’s an American hero, a patriot, and a man compelled to serve his nation beyond the sacrifice he’s already given in military service.

He’s also quite handsome. “Saturday Night Live’s” Pete Davidson attempted to make fun of him on the show’s broadcast over the weekend, comparing a photo of an eyepatch-donning Crenshaw to a “hit man from a porno movie.” He admitted that he knew Crenshaw’s eye injury was the result of being wounded “in war or whatever,” but that didn’t stop the joke from amusing Davidson.

Jokes about wounded veterans have not been historically well-received, and this SNL snafu was no different. Backlash was immediate, with many on social media calling for the comedian to be fired, or for NBC to cancel the show.

It wasn’t until the following morning that Crenshaw learned he had been the butt of a tasteless attempt at political humor. The congressional hopeful took to the high road, telling T.M.Z. he would not be demanding any apologies or resignations over the gaffe. He said, “I want to get away from this culture where we demand an apology every time someone misspeaks.”

An admirer of comedy, he dismissed the potential offense, instead pointing out that the joke just wasn’t funny. He elaborated to T.M.Z., “Veterans across the country probably don’t feel as though their wounds they received in battle should be the subject of a bad punch line for a bad joke. And here’s the real atrocity in all this: It wasn’t even funny. It was not original, it was not funny. It was just mean-spirited.”

Far from a “hitman from a porno” (Is that a thing?), Crenshaw is a retired Navy SEAL, in which capacity he served bravely for ten years. His eye injury occurred in 2012 when he was in the Helmand Province of Afghanistan. An IED exploded, killing his interpreter, and destroying Crenshaw’s right eye. After a long recovery period, and significant time wondering if vision to his left eye would be restored, Crenshaw returned to active duty with the use of only one eye for a further four years.

Crenshaw’s run for Congress is inspired by his call to serve his country. His campaign website explains his choice to run this way: “Dan can no longer fight on the battlefield, but he can bring the integrity, leadership, vision, and tenacity learned in the SEAL teams to fight in Congress for common sense policies that ensure our nation’s prosperity and security, represent our Judeo-Christian values, and again give Texans a reason to be proud of their leaders.”

Crenshaw is the sexy congressman America needs right now. He is a man who defines himself by standing firm on his issues, doing anything in his power to defend his home, and dedicating his life in service of a country he loves. He also dresses like Thor to hand out candy on Halloween.

He brushed off an offensive swipe at his conservative politics because he knows that “Saturday Night Live” is not a worthy adversary. Perhaps Davidson thought he would get a laugh making fun of a man missing an eye, but what he did was put an American hero into a spotlight that has too long been crowded with men of weak character and bad jokes.

If SNL was trying to derail Crenshaw’s political aspirations, they have failed. America is ready for candidates like him to represent our value in freedom, and our appreciation for those that risk everything to defend it. Thank you, SNL, for bringing such a wonderful, ruggedly good-looking man to our attention.