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You Just Have A Cold. Don’t Give Branch Covidians Their Numbers By Testing

Don’t get tested, don’t self-report, and don’t be a statistic for the neurotic control freaks who emerged in the past few years.


It’s the season for respiratory viruses. Chances are, you and your loved ones might catch one, but just say no, at least to the nasal swab. Encourage your family and friends to do the same. The Covid-19 test won’t change anything, but positive tests will fuel the media and health bureaucracy’s hysterical efforts to impose medical martial law. 

I’m not just pontificating here. Recently, I felt myself going downhill. Thinking it was strep throat, which seemed to be going around the kids’ school, where I’d spent a number of hours watching my oldest play volleyball, I booked an appointment at my doctor’s office. The test for strep came back negative, though, and that’s when the nurse practitioner said something that surprised me. 

“It may be the early stages of the flu,” she said. “It could be Covid. It’s going around. But the tests are so inaccurate, I don’t recommend getting one.”  

So I skipped the test. She prescribed steroids and a Z-Pak and sent me on my way, which is what she would have done if I had tested and it had come back positive. Given the brain fog I suffered and that the kids at the school tested positive for Covid and negative for strep, I likely had the best-engineered virus U.S. taxpayers could buy.  

In other words, I had an unpleasant cold for about a week. No one around me got sick, I healed, and life moved on.   

With the fall virus season in full swing, there’s a chance you’re going to get it. There’s a chance your kid is going to get it. There’s a chance a loved one is going to catch it.  

Don’t play the game. Don’t get tested, don’t self-report, and don’t be a statistic for the neurotic control freaks stoked by corporate media in the past few years. Be the anti-Nike: just don’t do it. Stay away from people, eat some chicken noodle soup, maybe get some steroids and a Z-Pak from your doctor, but don’t give the Branch Covidians the numbers they want to see.   

The neurotics are anxious for Covid panic to come back. They’re looking for excuses to reassert control. An elementary school in Maryland has already brought back mask mandates. So, too, have Rutgers University, Morris Brown College, hospitals in California and New York, and Lionsgate Studios. Joe Biden’s staff announced he’s wearing masks again.

If you think I’m being paranoid, then look to the Associated Press, which tells us not to worry because “there’s no sign that anyone in federal or state leadership is considering widespread COVID-19 restrictions, requirements or mask mandates.” Someone should ask a gas stove for its opinion on the media assuring us that people have nothing to fear.    

For starters, masks don’t work. They are the tiger thwarting rocks of respiratory virus interventions. More important, though, the latest variant, whatever it’s called, is continuing Covid’s evolutionary journey toward becoming a fairly mild and constantly circulating cold.  

Dr. Jill Biden, despite being a doctor, caught it and quickly recovered without incident, and she’s 72. Her husband, President Joe Biden, did allow himself to be tested, but in a rare moment of clarity he refused to wear the mask his handlers tried to put on him. Instead, he told a group of reporters, “Don’t tell them I didn’t have it on,” when he was caught on camera without it.    

For once, Biden made the right call. In this narrow instance, it’s even okay to emulate him, though you might also want to bite his style if you’re trying to win a dog in a truth-telling contest at a church carnival. Do not emulate him when it comes to getting tested constantly, though.  

Look, I get it. Spring of 2020 was a mildly terrifying time — the media helped ensure that it was — but it’s time to let it go. The Wu Flu is here to stay, regardless of any of the measures that have completely failed to stop it ever since it escaped the lab via a plucky pangolin. Don’t test. Don’t report. Don’t worry about it.  

You’re not dying. You just can’t think of anything good to do, and besides, in 2023, it’s just Covid. 

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