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Childless Chris Evans’ Inspiring Condemnation Of Anti-LGBT Bigots: ‘Those People Die Off Like Dinosaurs’

Actor sitting down for movie interview
Image CreditReuters/YouTube

Evans’s lack of children gives much greater weight to his insistence that all LGBTQIA2 opponents will go the way of the dodo.


Without doubt, those who favor LGBT acceptance are morally superior to those who believe the various forms of homosexuality to be sinful. LGBTQ advocates are good and holy and virtuous. Their cause is so just that there is never a reason for them to question their moral assumptions. Don’t listen to those divisive spirits who tell you otherwise.

The bigots of this world imagine themselves to be quite clever. To rattle you, they will insist that you wouldn’t have to aggressively propagandize young children if it were abundantly clear that LGBTQI identities are equal to cisnormative ones. To make you doubt the justice of your cause, they will confuse you with statistics and appeal to outdated concepts like biology, claiming that straight religious couples with functioning, compatible genitalia and a high view of children tend to procreate at much higher rates than both gay couples and those whose ovaries and testicles are currently decomposing in medical waste landfills. Next, when you remind them that they’re on the wrong side of history, they’ll repeat the debunked claim that history is more likely to be written by those who exist than those who don’t.

What should you do, then, when their deceptive words are humming in your ears? Where can you turn when you’re haunted by the lie that the breeders and believers will inherit the earth and dash to pieces your child drag queen Shangri-La?

Thank science for Chris Evans.

Recently, Disney/Pixar released its newest animated feature, “Lightyear,” a film that bravely gave cinematic representation to the world’s most under-represented demographic–slightly gay secondary characters whose homosexuality is prominent enough to annoy cultural moderates but not enough to lose their money (oops!).

In response to the criticisms of the bigots who complain about the presence of a same-sex kiss in a film for children, Evans, the voice of this version of Buzz Lightyear, spoke bluntly in a recent interview with Reuters Television, insisting that those who oppose LGBTQIA characters in children’s films are not worthy of your concern. Their complaints will perish with them. Their bigotry will be swept into the dustbin of history. You simply need to wait for them to enter extinction.

To understand why his words are so comforting, it’s important to remember that Evans is an unmarried 41-year-old man with no children. Had his words been spoken by a man who sired offspring, they would be of no comfort to you. Had this malediction been declared by a man with a dedicated commitment to fathering children to whom he could pass on his beliefs, these words would have carried little weight. In fact, they would only have reinforced the false notions that demographics is ideological destiny and that children won’t prefer one mommy and one daddy to two daddies and three themparents unless they become victims of Baptist brainwashing.

Evans’s lack of children, therefore, gives much greater weight to his insistence that all LGBTQIA2 opponents will go the way of the dodo. How can you not be comforted by the glorious confidence of this man who has reached middle age and yet has zero children to enroll in Miss Naughty’s Preschool for Drag Princesses? If kidless Captain America is certain that transgender eight-year-olds will still be a thing when the children of anti-LGBTQIA2+ Christians, Mormons, and Muslims inherit the earth, why should we fear?

“The real truth is those people are idiots,” Evans said, speaking of the homophobic brigade objecting to his film.

Indeed they are! And you should be so confident of their idiocy that you do not fear forgoing procreation and leaving the children of your ideological enemies to continue your march towards queer justice. They’ll gladly oblige!

“Every time there’s been social advancement as we wake up, the American story, the human story is one of constant social awakening and growth and that’s what makes us good,” the film star added. 

Absolutely! The human story is one long march towards libertine justice! Societies only grow stronger the more they encourage sterility and physically destructive sexual behaviors. That never brings about cultural collapse. So don’t feel an ounce of dread when you look at those Christian parents filling their 12-passenger van with their Christian children. Surely their great-grandchildren will curse their memory and praise yours.

“There’s always going to be people who are afraid and unaware and trying to hold on to what was before. But those people die off like dinosaurs,” declared the actor whose name would also die off like the dinosaurs if he were to perish tomorrow. 

And may his example also inspire us to trust that our righteous names will live on forever in the songs of the children we never bore.

“I think the goal is to pay them no mind, march forward and embrace the growth that makes us human,” Evans concluded.

Amen, New Buzz Lightyear. If we simply embrace the growth that makes us human by rejecting the growth that makes humans, the kingdom ours will remaineth.