When it comes to being handled with kid gloves by the media, Joe Biden is the king. During the campaign, which largely did not feature Joe Biden, the legacy media did the heavy lifting to get their man in the White House. Since his inauguration, things have only gotten worse. From covering trips to get ice cream to hard-hitting exposes on Joe and Kamala Harris’s fashion sense to fawning “think pieces” on Biden’s dogs, there is nothing too trivial not to mention when it comes to the president.
As such, it’s mildly shocking that the press is even covering the fact that Joe’s dogs have been sent back to Delaware after Major, the German Shepherd rescue that he adopted in December 2018, “had what one of the people described as a ‘biting incident.’”
CNN also noted the White House did not “immediately” respond to a request for comment on the dog situation, surely one of the most important things going on in the world right now. Though maybe the White House is realizing its best strategy is to continue limiting communications as much as possible. I’m sure they’ll circle back to Major at some point, particularly when there’s something else they’d rather not comment on and need their lapdogs to collectively shout “squirrel!”
This isn’t actually the first time Major has been in the news for less than positive reasons. Back in December, Biden fractured his foot when the dog wanted to play as Biden was getting out of the shower. As Joe said of the incident:
What happened was I got out of the shower. I got a dog and anybody who’s been around my house knows — dropped, little pup dropped a ball in front of me, and for me to grab the ball. And I’m walking through this little alleyway to get to the bedroom, and I grabbed the ball like this and he ran. And I’m joking, running after him and grab his tail. And what happened was that he slid on a throw rug, and I tripped on the rug he slid on.
Beyond the fact that word salad was slightly more coherent than we’ve come to expect, there’s a bigger issue: If Trump had broken his foot chasing his dog naked and pulling his tail, like Biden did, and then the dog was shipped off for attacking a staff member, the media would be flipping out about abuse, protesting out there right now. We’d be reading stories about how Hitler’s favorite dogs were German Shepherds because you know what that means.
But nope — not this time. Of course not. CNN is running cover for the Biden White House and pretending that this picture doesn’t exist:
A person familiar with the dogs’s schedule confirms to CNN they are in Delaware but noted they have been known to stay there with minders when the first lady is out of town. Biden departed Monday afternoon for a two-day trip to Washington and California to visit military bases.
There’s a dog bed leaning against a wall outside the White House pic.twitter.com/vpi3Dh2Xmc
— Jordan Fabian (@Jordanfabian) March 9, 2021
And to be honest, maybe the staff is just airing out the bed. We don’t really know because Press Secretary Jen Psaki, as usual, refused to answer questions about the dogs, including whether or not Major bit a member of the Secret Service. She did indicate, however, that Major won’t be euthanized and that the dogs will return to the White House soon.
Of course, none of this truly matters. It would if it were a “man bites dog” story, and given Joe’s predilection for smelling people as a greeting, perhaps we’re not far from that. But as of right now, the story is one of dog bites man, though in this case, it does matter and not least because it’s getting coverage.
It all brings to mind a joke. If a man wants to know who truly loves him — his wife, or his dog — he should put both of them in the trunk, drive around for a while, open the trunk, and see which one is happy to see him.
And this gets at the heart of the actual problem. When it comes to our supposedly objective press, the people preventing democracy from dying in the dark, they’d faithfully jump out of the trunk of Biden’s Camaro, lick him on the face, and wait for his next command.
