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Why Muslim Terrorists Are Today’s Vikings

The Muslim extremist idea of killing all one’s enemies is not so different from the Viking worldview.


Remember learning about Vikings in school? You know the ones. They had the hats with horns, the boats with dragons on the front, and they terrorized all of Europe for hundreds of years. They would descend upon a town, kill all the men, rape the women, and steal anything of value. There was even an acrynom for that: RPP, for rape, pillage, and plunder. That’s what they did. Eight hundred years ago, most Europeans were terrified of them.

Is there any comparably dangerous group in recent days? A group that commits horrible acts of violence, and targets women for sexual assault? Of course there is. I don’t even have to name it. Everyone knows the answer: Muslim extremists.

Of course I don’t mean all Muslims. Foolish people are always quick to protest supposed Islamophobia, painting speakers of the truth as racists. This only reveals their ignorance of history. While most Muslims are not violent, the same could be said of Germans in 1940 or the British in 1776. Not every German was a Nazi, and only a small percentage of Brits were redcoats.

Even during the worst of the Viking menace, do you think all Danes ran around slaughtering and raping? Of course not. Many were farmers. And someone had to make the boats, the shoes, and tend to the sick.

We’re Talking about Motivating Ideas

The point was that the Viking culture, specifically their religion, encouraged violence—just as today, many Muslims are wonderful people who are totally peaceful, but many Islamic clerics encourage violence to non-Muslims, as does the Quran itself. “Kill them (the infidels) wherever you find them,” says the Quran. It’s not exactly an ambiguous line, though many today tie themselves into mental pretzels pretending it means something else.

Again, the idea of killing all one’s enemies is not so different from the Viking worldview. The Odin and Thor worshippers really didn’t have a problem with killing or even rape. Their religion basically encouraged conquest, like many pagan religions did back in the day. Thor was the God of war. Men prayed to him before battle.

Sound familiar? Surely you’ve seen video of Islamic terrorists screaming allahu akbar (god is great) before opening fire on innocents or blowing themselves up. The Fort Hood army psychiatrist who shot 13 soldiers in 2009 yelled it. The terrorist who shot up the gay nightclub in Orlando Florida, killing 49 innocents, actually stopped shooting long enough to call 911 and praise his god before killing more people. They all seem to say it.

Have Muslim extremist groups attacked innocent women? Here, too, the list is endless. The jihadi group Boko Haram famously kidnapped 276 schoolgirls in Nigeria in 2014. ISIS has kidnapped countless girls in Syria and Iraq, and has turned them into sex slaves. Even in the West this has happened. There was the incident in Cologne, Germany of 1,200 women being sexually assaulted on New Year’s Eve by gangs of Arab immigrants.

Think about Their Heavens

Think I’m overstating the Viking/Islamist connection? Let’s examine the two ideas of heaven. To the Vikings, heaven was Valhalla, basically a hall with an endless feast, tons of liquor, fighting, and wenching. How did a Viking get to Valhalla? He had to die in battle with a sword in his hand. Old Viking men, often obsessed with this, were known to keep a sword by their beds so they could grasp it when the time came.

And the Muslim idea of heaven? Seventy-two virgins. In other words, a harem of nubile young hotties, eager to please, presumably for eternity. How does a Muslim get there? Once again, he must die fighting for Allah to get to this epic Shangri-La.

So there you have it. Both groups terrorize their enemies, killing as many as possible. Both condone killing and raping. Both die (literally) to get into a twisted vision of heaven that sounds like a frat party run amok.

So it’s official. Extremist Muslims are the new Vikings. Maybe we should get them some of those hats with the horns. That or defeat them.